Last evening, around 8:00 p.m., my daughter decided to tell me she had a Math test today.
My immediate thought was…
Yeah, you could have told me this when I asked you six hours earlier!
What was hilarious was the fact that she thought she could tell me that and then slip into bed. I wasn’t having it! I made her stay up an additional 1.5 hours to quiz her on Math to ensure she was ready for her test today. She wasn’t liking that at all and really pouted when I told her tomorrow morning I’d be quizzing her again. I normally know about her tests in advance, but this one slipped right past me.
When I asked her why she didn’t tell me about the test? Her response was, I didn’t want to take the test.
Me: “The test was still going to take place, right?”
Daughter: Well, yeah…
Me: Well, doesn’t it make sense to be prepared so you do well? Poor grades are unacceptable in this house since I know your capabilities. You know this…
As I told her, childhood is a training manual… the habits you develop now can be beneficial to you as an adult. I also told her she might not always like the decisions I make for her and that’s fine, as she gets older I’ll step back and let her make more of her own decisions. My daughter and I are good friends, but I’m still her parent. When it comes to schooling, as much as I’m involved with her education to ensure she does well, I don’t want to hear any excuses.
My daughter is nine years old, so I’m not going to expect her to approach each activity with the same amount of enthusiasm, but you know what? That’s when it’s my job as the parent to step up and give her the gentle nudge needed or on the rare occasion banning her from a much loved activity to ensure she always does her best.
Regarding schoolwork, my daughter’s grades are either A’s or a B+. I would say part of the reason she does so well is that I do make an effort to be there and help her if she does struggle with something. It’s not always easy, I’m busy but I always make time for her. Sometimes this means that I have to do extra work to make sure I understand what she needs help with. Yes, that takes additional time, but if I want her to continue to do well, it’s my responsibility to do what’s needed to make that happen.
Teacher’s aren’t always to blame…
I am not one of those parents who always find blame with the teachers. Teachers aren’t always the issue. Sometimes parents need to understand that their “little darlings” are the culprits. It’s personal responsibility folks, quit making excuses for them! You really aren’t helping the situation when you do that. And you know what? Sometimes parents/guardians are to blame also for not doing enough to ensure that their children do well.