No excuses…

Not a quitterLast evening, around 8:00 p.m., my daughter decided to tell me she had a Math test today.

My immediate thought was…

Yeah, you could have told me this when I asked you six hours earlier!

What was hilarious was the fact that she thought she could tell me that and then slip into bed. I wasn’t having it! I made her stay up an additional 1.5 hours to quiz her on Math to ensure she was ready for her test today. She wasn’t liking that at all and really pouted when I told her tomorrow morning I’d be quizzing her again. I normally know about her tests in advance, but this one slipped right past me.
When I asked her why she didn’t tell me about the test? Her response was, I didn’t want to take the test.

Me: “The test was still going to take place, right?”

Daughter: Well, yeah…

Me: Well, doesn’t it make sense to be prepared so you do well? Poor grades are unacceptable in this house since I know your capabilities. You know this…

As I told her, childhood is a training manual… the habits you develop now can be beneficial to you as an adult. I also told her she might not always like the decisions I make for her and that’s fine, as she gets older I’ll step back and let her make more of her own decisions. My daughter and I are good friends, but I’m still her parent.  When it comes to schooling, as much as I’m involved with her education to ensure she does well, I don’t want to hear any excuses.

My daughter is nine years old, so I’m not going to expect her to approach each activity with the same amount of enthusiasm, but you know what? That’s when it’s my job as the parent to step up and give her the gentle nudge needed or on the rare occasion banning her from a much loved activity to ensure she always does her best.

Regarding schoolwork, my daughter’s grades are either A’s or a B+. I would say part of the reason she does so well is that I do make an effort to be there and help her if she does struggle with something. It’s not always easy, I’m busy but I always make time for her. Sometimes this means that I have to do extra work to make sure I understand what she needs help with. Yes, that takes additional time, but if I want her to continue to do well, it’s my responsibility to do what’s needed to make that happen.

Teacher’s aren’t always to blame…

I am not one of those parents who always find blame with the teachers. Teachers aren’t always the issue. Sometimes parents need to understand that their “little darlings” are the culprits. It’s personal responsibility folks, quit making excuses for them! You really aren’t helping the situation when you do that. And you know what? Sometimes parents/guardians are to blame also for not doing enough to ensure that their children do well.



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Exactly! Parental support and guidance is crucial even if it is just sitting there beside the kid to keep them company and to show interest in what they do.

Most Asian parents just push everything to the teachers these days and blame them when the kids don’t do well which is really very sad…and they send the kids for extra tuition classes so the kids can excel in their exams – the poor children here these days really don’t have a life at all.
suituapui recently posted..Another time, another place…


Agreed! I have lazy kids, and it got to the point with my son that everything I tried failed, and he still would not do his homework. So my only option was to let him fail. Only he did so well on the end of grade test that the principal passed him even though he failed everything. That was 5th grade, and that’s how he got through middle school. So I expect that he will be repeating 9th grade next year because he still won’t do homework. My daughter should be a junior, and I am pretty sure she will still be a 10th grader at the end of this school year. She fails thinking that we’ll let her drop out. But, that’s still not an option. She hates school because of social issues, and so at the end of this school year, we are going to withdraw her and homeschool her. My son actually wants to go to school; he just hates doing the work. It is frustrating. They are both really smart, but just have never applied themselves. There is more to the story than I am sharing, and while it took a lot of years to identify, it is out in the open now, and being worked on. Hopefully not to late to make a difference. 😉
DragonLady recently posted..‘Cause I like to eat


Oh my! She tried to slip one by ya! Eeeek! BUT…you stopped her in her tracks 🙂

If only I could be a fly on the wall sometimes – just to observe! You two are adorable and I admire you for not only being great friends with your daughter but also being a wonderful parent.

I bet it’s hard to do both but it seems you have it down! Awesome!
Jennifer recently posted..Rice is Nice, Naturally Sweet, and Never Any Meat!


Honestly, I think that in the most cases, it isn’t the teacher’s fault… my son used to blame his teachers all the time, although I always knew that he has cheated. Btw it is really important to get to know the teachers, so you can decide if your child is right or not.
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